Sometimes the trouble isn't in the bedroom, but in the bank account.

If you sometimes bicker with your significant other about money , you two aren't atypical. According to a new survey of 3,068 adults by the American Psychological Association, 31 percent of adults with partners report that money is a major source of conflict in their relationship.

The APA survey was taken in August 2014, but a report studying the responses was released last week.

Stress plus money is a combination that can overwhelm any couple, no matter how solid the relationship or economy. So if money threatens your romantic bliss, consider taking these steps now.

Get separate bank accounts. This is a favorite strategy of many couples, and it's an idea that makes a lot of sense .

"In the beginning of our marriage, we shared a bank account," says Jill Vanderwood, an author and publisher in Salt Lake City. "One of the problems we were having was that my husband didn't record the checks he wrote. He would say, 'I'm sure we have enough money to buy that.'"

But sometimes they would discover that, no, they didn't have the money.

"Another problem was that he always knew what I spent and would question every purchase, even when I bought him a gift," Vanderwood says.

But they each now have their own accounts and responsibilities to pay certain bills. "I say the key to a happy marriage is separate bank accounts," says Vanderwood, who celebrated her 35th wedding anniversary last week.

Shared bank accounts tend to work best when two people in a partnership are making enough money to easily separate their funds and still pay the bills . It may not be a practical solution for everyone.

Get professional help. Unsurprisingly, the APA recommends finding a psychologist who can help couples change their behaviors and learn how to communicate about money better, but financial advisors , too, can help with that. You might also find support from a marriage counselor.

Stephanie Freeman, who works for a college and lives in Raleigh, North Carolina, found help from her church, which offers a program in personality training.

"We argued every day … Our budget was so tight. Every single penny was being used for necessities. No frills," says Freeman, who has been married to her husband for 20 years. She recalls their worst argument happening in 2005, after taking their car to a mechanic. Her husband had asked her to report back to him with repair estimates before giving the OK to the mechanic.

Freeman decided to proceed without consulting her husband. "I knew he would have a fit," she says. "I figured he'd feel better once the car was fixed and for a reasonable price."

Freeman figured wrong. An argument ensued, and it was explosive. (Freeman threw her car keys and accidentally hit her husband in the head.) But that personality training, which they completed together in 2006, may have saved their marriage, she says.

"We discovered we're completely opposite in most everything," Freeman says. But by the end of the training, they felt that they each had a better understanding of how the other thinks and most importantly, they've learned techniques to communicate better.

Stop lying. If you tend to hide financial information from your partner – maybe you withhold bad money news, or don't tell your spouse about an expensive purchase – break that habit immediately.

"The biggest cause of money arguments is deception," says Gilda Carle, a relationship expert in New York City. "It might begin as innocently as her concealing the real price of a handbag she bought. Or him not telling her how much he spent on gifts for his kids. But innocent or not, if a relationship is founded on deception, whether it’s a marriage or a cohabitation, the money scene has been set for deception."

From there, the lies just get bigger and worse. "In the end, the shelf life of any relationship depends on truth and trust," Carle says.

Allocate money for each of you to "waste." That's a suggestion from a Canada-based behaviorist and life coach who goes by the name Robin H-C. She calls it a freestyle fund.

"That is a set amount that each person can spend per month on anything they want," H-C says. "Make a rule that freestyle funds are off-limits in terms of evaluating each others' purchases and common sense. So she can buy that overpriced handbag, and he can stock up on fishing equipment – a win-win."

Carle likes that approach, too. "It's best to have ‘his,’ ‘her’ and ‘our’ money pots," she says. "This way, both partners have discretionary spending."

Some people feel like they're regressing to when they had to get approval from their parents, if they must get the greenlight from a spouse before making a purchase, Carle says, adding: "Money symbolizes different things to different people."

Break up. Not every relationship should be saved , so instead of looking for solutions, in some cases, you may want to look for the exit door.

Giannina Ruiz, 20, an economics and political science major at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, New Jersey, recently came to that conclusion. She says that she and her ex used to argue about money on an almost daily basis.

For starters, it hurt her that her boyfriend never bought her any gifts for her birthday, Valentine's Day or Christmas and yet always had enough money to take road trips to different states to visit his fraternity brothers.

"He always had money when it came to supporting his fraternity, but never when it came to our relationship," Ruiz says. "Even when I offered to pay half on dinners and movies, he would just complain about how pointless it was to go out, when we could just as easily stay in and eat food made by our parents or watch a movie downloaded online. And for a while, I was OK with that. I was happy to just be with him."

But then her boyfriend began asking Ruiz for money to pay off his debts. The final indignity was after they went in on season tickets to an amusement park together. Her boyfriend was in charge of making the payments.

"I always gave him my part on time, each month, for our year payment plan," Ruiz says. "So, the end of the year comes along, and I find out that he was using my money on other things … We were then charged for overdue payments."

Ruiz broke it off. "This experience, while painful, was educational," she says. "While I'm not quite ready to settle down and get married, I am looking for someone that currently presents the qualities of a responsible future partner."

In fact, if you break up, you may decide the money you argued over was the best money you ever spent.

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